Smell the Blog

Thursday, January 23, 2003
WB Annouces Its Own Reality TV Series

In an effort to keep pace with the Big Four networks, the WB Network has announced its own new celebrity reality series:Celebrity Dumps.

"What could be more real?" asked WB Senior VP of Programming Phil McCracken. "You've got real-life celebrties eating bran muffins, drinking coffee and letting nature take its course. Now THAT'S real-life!"

Viewers have exciting episodes right off the bat according to McCracken. "In our debut episonde, Corbin Bernsen pinches off a big ol' loaf while reading 2 full sections of the Los Angeles Times." Bernsen was unavailable for comment.

Celebrity Dumps debuts Wednesday, January 29th at 9 PM on your local WB affiliate.

American Idol Missing that Special Something

OK, so we're all tunng into the new season of American Idol. Well, my friend Bill probably isn't, but everyone else is. And I know that you've noticed what I've noticed. It's missing that special something, or should I say someone that made the show so magical to watch. That's right, it's missing the Dunk. Brian "Assface" Dunkelman. You know you miss him and you can't live without him. It's just not the same! Why oh why did they have to take the Dunk away from us??? Why FOX, why???

p.s. My sister Sarah is in love with the Dunk.

U.S. says, "We Will Have a Wealth of Allies"

U.S. Secretary of Defense Donlad Rumsfeld put to rest any concerns that the U.S. will not have the support of allies when and if it oges forward with a war on Iraq. "We already have firm commitments for military support from Micronesia, Trinidad and Tobago, Tunisia, Luxembourg, and some tribes in Outer Mongolia. So as you see, this will be truly be an international coalition."

Tuesday, January 21, 2003
How do you spell M-O-R-O-N?

A first wave of mainly Western volunteers will leave London this weekend on a convoy bound for Iraq to act as "human shields" at key sites and populous areas in case of a U.S.-led war on Baghdad. "The potential for white Western body parts flying around with the Iraqi ones should make them think again about this imperialist oil war," organizer Ken Nichols, a former U.S. marine in the 1991 Gulf War , told Reuters.

Send us the co-ordinates of where you'll be guys. We need to program the weapons so they know to hit...errrr not hit where you're shielding. Yeah, that's the ticket. Who was it that coined the phrase "useful idiots"? Boy, they weren't kidding. Any other brutual dictators you feel like standing up for guys?