Smell the Blog

Saturday, February 01, 2003
We Weep for Columbia

I have nothing to add opinion-wise or fact wise. Check out Instapundit for all the latest. My thoughts are with the families of the astronauts. I feel like I'm 14 and it's 1986 all over again.

Idiotarian Glossary

Transterrestrial Musings has a hilarious glossary that clears up the puzzling language of the peaceniks.

Thursday, January 30, 2003
Leftists List More Solid Reasons Not to Invade Iraq

A group of leftists calling themselves "Not in Our Collective Names This Year or Any Other Year that ends in Whole Numbers" held a demonstration in the Mall in Washington DC on Thursday, January 30th. A host of speakers including actress Susan Sarandon, and her husband Tim Robbins, President of Fantasy World Martin Sheen, world traveler Sean Penn, former Civil Rights leader turned shakedown artist Jesse Jackson and speakers for the World Workers Socialist Something-or-other gave their latest reasons for why the U.S. should not invade Iraq at this time. These include:
1. We need to like, give the inspectors more time cause, like, that's what they're there for, to you know, find stuff. Then if they find stuff then we need to, you know, have a Security Council meeting where they could pass a resolution. Oh, and even though we haven't enforced the last 17 resolutions, this one, would be, you know, really forceful and then if Saddam, like, doesn't agree to co-operate this time, we could, you know threaten him with another resolution and maybe some strong sanctions, unless they would hurt the poor people of Iraq, so maybe sanctions aren't the answer, so we could, you know, maybe form a committee.

2. If the inspectors aren't finding anything, then maybe we could pass a resolution to get some inspectors to inspect the inspectors. Then they could verify that the UN Inspectors are doing their job verifying that Saddam doesn't have any weapons of mass destruction. But even if he did, we'd want to make sure we follow proper international channels and laws and such, cause we're not supposed to do anything without unanimous international approval and UN support, cause that's the way everything should work, you know, unanimous international support, well except Iraq, of course, cause they probably would vote against it, and that would make it impossible to pass any more resolutions, you know?

3. Have you seen the suffering of the Iraqi people? It's because we're such evil exploiters of the world's wealth and they're just, you know, suffering because we put these sanctions on their country that impoverishes them, and how's Saddam supposed to feed them, if like, he doesn't have any way to feed them? Some say that he uses that oil for food money for palaces, but how do you build palaces out of food? That's just silly talk.

4. If we could save one innocent Iraqi life, we shouldn't invade because losing one life would be a tragedy, you know. How could we live knowing our invasion caused the death of one single innocent Iraqi life. If we don't invade, then they'll be safe under their benevolent ruler Saddam. You know, they might get tortured and stuff, if they speak out against him, but why would they ever want to do that? He provides them a daily ration. That's more than the evil, oil grubbing capitalist pigs do in this God forsaken country where only money and greed and SUV's and oil matter! Racist Republican scum!

There were many more reasons covered during the rally, but the reporter covering the event went insane and is currently on heavy medication.

Design Concept for World Trade Center Redevelopment Is Inspiring, Thought-Provoking

Officials with the Lower Manhattan Development Corp. and other agencies will meet Monday and are expected to choose two finalists out of the nine designs unveiled Dec. 18. A final choice is expected in February. While all the designs are unique, some have clearly separated themselves from the pack.

The clear favorite among many, is Harold Klein's design of two 100 story hands, each the with middle finger extended in the direction of Saudi Arabia. "I think it sends the message that we'd all, deep down, like to send Bin Laden and all his scumbag terrorist friends," Klein was quoted as saying. "I thought about a 200 foot statue of a guy grabbing his crotch and spitting in the direction of Saudi Arabia, but then i thought that might be a little much to take in. Two giant birds being flipped at the terrorists' homeland? Now EVERYONE understands that."

New York Times architecture critic Herbert Muschamp, said this week that although the other design concepts have much more to offer in terms of architecutal daring and subtle beauty, they lack the bold "F*&& You" proclaimation that Harold's design has employed. I think that's really the best message we can send."

Bush Nominee Pushed Through Committee

The Republican-controlled Senate Judiciary Committee voted along party lines today to push nominee of Miguel Estrada to the Circuit Court of Appeals for the District of Columbia in a stunning gold plated wheelchair, spurning Democrats' arguments that he would just "waltz" in without a hearing.

Democrats on the Committee were furious. One anonymous Senator said, "They just wheeled him in and pushed him right past us! How dare they just push him through committee like that! Is this what democracy is all about?"

Republican Judiciary Committee Chairman Orrin G. Hatch (R-Utah) said, "We expect it will be a lot tougher to push him through the full Senate. It's a much bigger room with lots of chairs and some steps. It won't be easy, but we plan to push Judge Estrada all the way through the Senate."

The Honduras-born Estrada is a former federal prosecutor who, if confirmed, would become the first Hispanic to join the D.C. circuit court, which is generally regarded as second in importance to the Supreme Court. He is also seen as a possible choice to fill any Supreme Court vacancy that occurs while Bush is president.

Monday, January 27, 2003
Crazy Cat Lady=???? Dude

It seems like every community has a crazy cat lady. You know, the old woman who is either widowed or never married and has anywhere from 20-200 cats living in her run down abode. This particular Reno woman had 60 cats. My question is, what is the male equivalent of this? Is there one? You never read about a crazy cat guy. Or even a crazy dog guy. At most, I've seen guys with 3 dogs, but have you ever seen an old dude with more than one? It just doesn't happen.

I just wonder what the male equivalent to the crazy cat lady is. Perhaps the 65 year old guy with the fleet of Porches? Anyone?