Smell the Blog

Friday, February 14, 2003
Iraq vows to work work with inspectors

Iraq says it will continue working with U.N. inspectors and do "whatever possible" to prove it does not have weapons of mass destruction.

"We will do whatever possible, in our hands, in our capabilities, to help them to reach the ultimate truth about the absence of weapons of mass destruction," Iraq Deputy Prime Minister Tariq Aziz said. "we will show them all around our nation and show them every area they wish to inspect except the secret ones no one knows about...DAMN!!!!"

Tuesday, February 11, 2003
Iraqi civilians being used as shields, Bush blamed by Hollywood

President Bush on Monday accused Iraqi leader Saddam Hussein of using Iraqi citizens as human shields by positioning his military forces among civilians.

''Saddam Hussein regards the Iraqi people as human shields, entirely expendable when their suffering serves his purposes,'' Bush said in a speech to a convention of religious broadcasters. ''America views the Iraqi people as human beings who have suffered long enough under this tyrant.''

Hollywood "activists" responded to Bush's allegations. President in Never Never Land Martin Sheen had the following statement released:
The imperialist aggression shown by our selected President and his illegal junta has forced Saddam Hussein to hide his military troops among women and children. How can we stand by while our so-called leader forces the Iraqi government into such a precarious position that they are forced to these kinds of lengths to protect their interests? It is now readily apparent that any deaths suffered by innocent Iraqi citizens will be on the head of Bush and Bush alone."

Naive nudists strip for peace

On a cold snowy morning in Central Park in New York City, a group of women took off their clothes and spelled out "NO BUSH" in the snow, in an apparent attempt to protest President Bush's plans to go to war with Iraq. It was described by a protester as a 'nude political action photo shoot'.

At the same time in Byron Bayon, Australia, which is on the New South Wales north coast about 200 km (124 miles) south of Brisbane, 750 women stripped and spelled out "No war" inside the shape of a heart.

Representatives of both groups made a journey to Iraq to present pictures of their photo shoots to Saddam and his people to demonstrate their solidarity with the Iraqi people. They were all subesequently executed under Sharia law.

Sunday, February 09, 2003
Madonna Plans Video To Protest War, Bush

From the Drudge Report:
Madonna is hoping to cause maximum controversy with a new video from her forthcoming CD, AMERICAN LIFE, the DRUDGE REPORT can reveal.

Editing is in progress on a musical video concept which insiders say may be the most shocking anti-war, anti-Bush statement yet to come from the showbusiness industry.


"She's taking it all the way this time," one source said from Los Angeles over the weekend, "pushing all of the buttons... It is a sweeping political commentary on the modern 'American Dream' and how 'nothing is what is seems.'"

The song will be released to radio next week.

Dressed in commando fatigues, Madonna throws grenades as the techno terror beat pounds, claims a source. Limb-less men and women are reportedly shown, with bloody babies.

One disturbing clip features Iraqi children.

"The video escalates into a mad frenzy depicting the catastrophic repercussion and horror of war."

There is no word from Madonna's camp on whether or not she plans on releasing a video showing the horror of being an Iraqi citizen under the rule of Saddam Hussein, complete with inhuman torturing, late night abduction of dissidents, families murdered and a total lack of freedom. Apparently, as with many U.S. celebrities, Maddona is so naive that she is completely unaware of this situation or simply chooses to ignore it. Again, Maddona's camp could not tell us which it was.

Belgium to Block NATO Military Aid for Turkey

The Belgian government said today that it would veto a U.S. request that NATO provide military materiel for Turkey to defend itself in the event of a conflict with neighboring Iraq. The announcement exposed raw divisions across the Atlantic and within Europe on the buildup for war and plunged the alliance into a new crisis.

When asked to respond to this veto threat, Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld said, "Interesting. The next time Belgium actually adds something of value to NATO will be the first time. The have some nerve pulling this horseshit. Why does Belgium even exist anyway? Are they even a real country?"